slowly but surely, i'm finding my way

i posted this video showing a painting in progress (start to finish) a long, long time ago but it's been mistakenly set to private on youtube all of this time. i had no idea! i just changed the status from private to public and thought i'd share it here again.

my truth over here is that i've barely, and i mean barely, had any time to paint. with zero childcare and total physical + mental exhaustion, i'm just not getting to my studio table. in my old life, i could unearth my reserves and charge through, but in this new life exhaustion trumps everything, surrender is front and center, and there are no reserves.

it's so strange to live in a world where the inspiration is there yet the energy is not. we are currently working on finding the right part-time nanny (this has been such a HARD, but totally necessary step for me). once we have some help, and once i get a moment or two of sustained recovery/rest, i can't wait to get back to the table. i've never been in this situation before - one where i'm soooo inspired yet i literally can't find the time to act on that inspiration. it's driving me bonkers.

i'm finding my way.....slowly but surely. i'll get there. i just know it.

update: i wrote this post several days ago and since writing it, i'm happy to announce that we have found an awesome nanny. i had the same intuitive, instant connection with her that i had when i met my studio assistant, dani. i love it when that happens. feeling really thankful that more studio time, more self recovery time, and maybe even a date night or two are on the way soon. life is good.